Some therapists listen to words. Michele LaFemina reads energy.
She can tell within minutes whether someone will open up or shut down, whether the room feels aligned or off-kilter, whether trust has a chance to take root. It’s not magic—it’s intuition honed over twenty years of sitting across from people carrying wounds they’ve never spoken aloud. And it’s this gift, combined with unflinching honesty and deep compassion, that makes her one of the most effective leaders in mental health care today.
As Clinical Director at Pathways Treatment Center in New Jersey, Michele doesn’t run her practice like a traditional clinic. There are no cookie-cutter treatment plans, no one-size-fits-all approaches. Instead, she’s built something rarer: a space where therapy truly becomes what it should be—a tell-all safe haven where people can shed their armor and confront the messy reality of healing. She knows that recovery isn’t linear, that trauma doesn’t follow timelines, and that real transformation happens when someone finally feels safe enough to be vulnerable.
Michele’s path to this work began long before she earned her credentials. Growing up, friends confided in her about divorce, abuse, eating disorders—struggles they couldn’t share with anyone else. She became the keeper of secrets, the one who held space when everything felt like it was falling apart. Those experiences didn’t just shape her empathy; they ignited a calling. Two decades later, she’s still doing the same work, just on a much larger scale, guiding both clients and clinicians through the difficult terrain of mental wellness.
What makes Michele’s leadership distinctive is her commitment to practicing what she preaches. She sets boundaries fiercely, seeks supervision regularly, and refuses to pour from an empty cup. She’s worked through her own biases, confronted her triggers, and learned that being a great therapist means being brutally honest with yourself first. It’s this authenticity that creates the ripple effect—when leaders model self-care and integrity, entire teams and communities follow.
Drawn to her powerful philosophy on healing, boundaries, and what it really takes to lead in mental health, we connected with Michele to explore how she’s spent two decades helping people rediscover their strength—and what she believes the next generation of women in this field needs to know.
Michele, you’ve worked across so many mental health settings — from in-home therapy to private practice to now leading as Clinical Director. What first drew you to the world of mental health, and what keeps your passion alive after 20 years in this work?
I was drawn to mental health through my own experiences with trauma and witnessing friends struggle at a young age. Many friends confided in me about challenges like parental divorce, eating disorders, and abuse, and I realized early on that I wanted to help others navigate these struggles. What keeps my passion alive after 20 years is seeing people reclaim their strength and resilience. The privilege of guiding someone through healing, whether as a therapist or a leader, never loses its meaning.
You’ve said therapy should be a “tell-all safe space.” In your experience, what truly makes someone feel safe enough to be vulnerable — and how do you foster that kind of trust as a therapist and leader?
Safety comes from energy and presence. If the space doesn’t feel aligned, people won’t open up. Building trust takes time and consistent empathy, and it often relies on intuition — clients decide when to let someone in. As a leader, I mirror this approach with my team: I provide guidance and support while allowing clinicians to learn and navigate challenges themselves. Leading with compassion, honesty, and integrity creates a safe environment where both staff and clients can grow.
Mental health often sounds clinical, but healing can be deeply human and messy. Can you share a moment (without breaching confidentiality) that reminded you of the power of compassion and human connection in therapy?
One client was navigating the deaths of both parents while pregnant and then caring for her first child. She experienced profound grief, loss, and the challenge of motherhood simultaneously. Walking alongside her through this journey reminded me how healing is rarely neat — it’s messy, deeply human, and strengthened by connection and consistent compassion.
You emphasize the importance of healthy emotional boundaries. Why do you think so many people, especially women, struggle with them, and what’s one step they can take to begin setting boundaries without guilt?
Many of us, especially women, are socialized to “be good,” prioritize others, and tolerate toxic dynamics. Poor boundaries often stem from unmet childhood needs or trauma. Learning to set boundaries begins with self-awareness: understanding your limits, acknowledging red flags, and recognizing that saying no is not selfish — it’s self-preserving. Sometimes, protecting yourself means walking away from situations that compromise your values. Self-compassion and honesty are essential; trauma may be at the root, so showing yourself grace is part of the work.
You’re also an ally to the LGBTQ+ community. What does inclusive therapy mean to you, and how can mental health professionals better support clients from all identities and experiences?
I believe God has taught me about love and to love everyone. He has shown me that every life matters in this world of creation. The background of the individual and their sexuality or non-sexuality should not be a reason that each person does not receive love, compassion, understanding, and respect. I am inclusive of everyone.
I struggled with my own sexuality after being raped and sexually abused. I understand the struggle, and at the base of things, often again, is trauma that may or may not have been addressed. I think you have to be open-minded; not everyone is. A lot of times, religious beliefs can overshadow how one may or may not judge someone based on their sexual background. Let’s be honest — we all come through the door with certain judgments we have been exposed to in our own families.
As therapists, we are taught not to hold certain beliefs or judgments, yet it can be difficult if one is not accustomed to working with a certain population. For myself, I once said I would never work with sex offenders. I ended up working in a prison with sexual offenders, both men and women, for a year. It was very tough at times. I was triggered and would process with my therapist when issues came up.
Being honest with yourself and your belief system is essential. It may differ from what you are taught in school or professionally. You may be expected to work with all people, including those with LGBTQ+ issues. If you are feeling judgmental, they will feel it. Trust will be unable to be established, and it may cause more harm to the client if you do not work through your own biases.
You’ve witnessed the evolution of mental health care over two decades. What changes — in awareness, stigma, or treatment — give you hope for the future?
Over the past twenty years, I’ve seen mental healthcare undergo a transformation that gives me genuine hope for the future. The shift has been gradual at times and urgent at others, but the direction has been consistently forward.
Awareness has expanded dramatically.
What used to be private struggles are now part of public conversation. People name their symptoms more readily, ask earlier questions, and seek help before reaching crisis. Schools, workplaces, and community spaces have all become more proactive in recognizing mental health needs and creating pathways to support.
Stigma, while not gone, has undeniably decreased.
We’re seeing a meaningful cultural shift. Clients walk through the door with less shame and more willingness to engage. Families talk about anxiety, trauma, and addiction with a level of openness that was far less common twenty years ago. We also see greater representation of diverse communities in the mental health narrative, which is essential for long-term progress.
Treatment itself has advanced in both science and humanity.
Evidence-based practices have become more refined and accessible. Neuroscience has deepened our understanding of how trauma and stress affect the brain. At the same time, care has become more holistic — embracing lived experience, cultural identity, and the spiritual dimensions of healing. Technology has expanded reach through telehealth, giving individuals in rural or underserved areas access they would not have had a decade ago.
What gives me hope for the future is the direction we’re moving — toward integration, compassion, and collaboration.
We’re beginning to see mental health woven into primary care, education, and community systems rather than treated as an isolated specialty. Young people are growing up with a vocabulary for emotional health that prior generations never had. Professionals across disciplines are talking to each other in ways that break silos and strengthen care.
If the last two decades were about bringing mental health into the light, the next two will be about building systems that honor every person’s full humanity. And that gives me tremendous hope.
As Clinical Director at Pathways Treatment Center, you balance clinical oversight with nurturing your team. How do you support your staff’s emotional well-being while managing such a demanding environment?
As a Clinical Director at Pathways Treatment Center, balancing clinical oversight with nurturing a diverse team requires intentional stewardship of my own emotional well-being. I’ve learned that I cannot lead effectively if I am not grounded myself. I support my emotional health through three core practices:
Structured Boundaries and Clear Transitions
I set firm boundaries around my time, availability, and emotional capacity. When the day ends, I intentionally transition out of “director mode” so I can reconnect with who I am outside the role. This protects both my clarity and my compassion.
Reflective Practice and Trusted Consultation
I make space for reflection — pausing to check in with myself, seek consultation, and process challenges with trusted colleagues. Supervision is not just for emerging clinicians; it is a professional safeguard for leaders. It keeps me aligned with my values, grounded in best practice, and supported as a human being.
Spiritual and Restorative Wellness Rituals
My emotional resilience comes from nurturing my inner life. Prayer, meditation, journaling, and time with my family anchor me. Movement, nature, and intentional rest keep me centered. These are non-negotiables, because they allow me to show up with clarity, stability, and presence.
Ultimately, I believe leadership in behavioral health requires modeling what we teach: balance, boundaries, humility, and holistic wellness. When I protect my well-being, I lead with more empathy, make better decisions, and cultivate a healthier culture — one where my team feels supported, clients feel safe, and the work remains sustainable.
Working in mental health can be emotionally taxing. How do you take care of yourself and protect your own mental space while helping others navigate theirs?
Working in mental health is rewarding but emotionally demanding. I protect my mental space through clear boundaries, reflective practice, and restorative habits like journaling, spiritual reflection, and time for rest. Modeling self-care helps me stay grounded, resilient, and fully present for both clients and my team.
I rely on supervision, peer consultation, and trusted mentors to process challenging cases and gain perspective — because even as a leader, I recognize the importance of guidance and support. Additionally, I cultivate personal wellness through spiritual practice, journaling, time in nature, and intentional rest, which help me stay grounded and resilient.
Ultimately, protecting my mental space is not separate from my work — it enhances it. By modeling self-care and balance, I foster a culture where my team and clients see that emotional well-being is a priority, not a luxury, and that healing begins with presence, clarity, and sustainable compassion.
If you could leave one message with every person who has ever walked into your office, what would it be? And looking ahead, what legacy do you hope to leave behind in the field of mental health?
If I could leave one message with every person who has walked into my office, it would be this: You are stronger, more worthy, and more capable than your pain ever taught you to believe. Healing is not about erasing the past — it’s about reclaiming the truth of who you are.
My work has always been guided by faith — faith in the resilience of the human spirit and faith that even in darkness, there is always a path forward. I believe every person carries a God-given spark of strength, and part of my calling has been helping them rediscover it.
Looking ahead, the legacy I hope to leave is simple: that I led with integrity, compassion, and courage; that I elevated trauma-informed care; and that I created spaces where people felt safe to be seen, heard, and transformed. If clients left with hope and young clinicians left with direction, then my life’s work has mattered.
For young women entering the mental health profession, especially in a world still learning to prioritize emotional wellness, what advice would you share about staying authentic, empathetic, and resilient?
For young women stepping into the mental health field today — at a time when our world is only beginning to truly value emotional wellness — my greatest advice is this: Lead with authenticity, practice empathy with boundaries, and cultivate resilience from the inside out.
Authenticity will be one of your strongest clinical tools. Clients don’t need perfection; they need someone real, grounded, and present. Allow your voice, your values, and your humanity to guide your practice. You don’t have to know everything on day one — your willingness to stay curious will carry you much farther than trying to appear flawless.
At the same time, learn to protect your empathy. Empathy is powerful, but without boundaries it becomes depletion. Practice compassionate witnessing rather than absorbing others’ pain. Use supervision, consultation, and peer support not as a sign of weakness but as a mark of professionalism. Sustainable empathy is one of the most important skills you will ever develop.
As you grow, commit to nurturing your own emotional wellness with the same seriousness you expect from clients. This work demands presence and emotional labor, and you cannot pour from an empty cup. Engage in your own therapy, create rituals that regulate and ground you, and give yourself permission to rest. Resilience is not built from pushing harder — it comes from intentional replenishing.
Seek out mentors who reflect the type of clinician and leader you want to become — those who value integrity, model healthy boundaries, and encourage your voice rather than shaping you into theirs. Remember that your presence is part of the intervention. Long before any technique takes hold, clients feel your attunement, consistency, and safety. Who you are matters just as much as what you do.
Finally, never underestimate your role in shaping the future of this profession. Advocate for your clients, for yourself, and for systemic change. Use your voice to challenge stigma, promote trauma-informed care, and push for greater access and equity. Leadership doesn’t happen only in titles — it happens every time you speak up, stand firm in your values, and choose integrity.
You are entering a field that is demanding, sacred, and deeply needed. Stay authentic. Stay empathetic. Stay resilient. And above all, stay connected to the purpose that called you into this work — because that purpose will sustain you more than anything else.
